The following is satirical.
CNN Anchorman Chris Cuomo apparently doesn’t like being called Fredo. The dumbest member of a powerful Italian family with a father who raised them from poverty to the heights of influence and a brother who inherited that mantle and became a spawn of evil, Cuomo says the phrase is an insult meant to represent the dumbest member of a powerful Italian family with a father who raised them from poverty to the heights of influence and a brother who inherited that mantle and became a representative of evil — and is therefore a racial slur.
When Cuomo was recently approached by a right-wing troll who called him Fredo, he lost his temper and launched into a foul mouthed rant, threatening the troll with violence and saying he would ensure that the troll and all his friends were massacred in a groundbreaking cinematic montage during the baptism of his nephew.
After the incident, Cuomo released a statement through family lawyer Tom Hagen, saying, “Calling me Fredo is an insult. Unlike Fredo, I can handle things and I’m smart — not like everybody says, like dumb. I’m smart and I want some respect.”
A spokesman for CNN defended Cuomo’s outburst, saying, “Normally, when a newsman unleashes denigrating invective at a person simply because that person disagrees with him politically, the newsman would be fired. But here at CNN, that’s our entire business model.”
Conservative commentator Sean Hannity also defended Cuomo, saying, “Chris was with his wife and 9-year-old daughter when the troll approached him so obscenity-laced threats of physical violence in response to mild mockery were entirely appropriate.”
President Trump, however, took issue with Cuomo, saying, “He completely lost control and said idiotic stuff that could compromise his popularity with anyone who doesn’t already agree with him and you’d never see me doing something like that.”
CNN said it would continue to support Cuomo completely but that the anchorman was not available for comment because he had gone fishing on the lake with Al Neri.