https://babylonbee.com/news/10-key-moments-from-bidens-state-of-the-union/


President Joe Biden delivered his first State of the Union address yesterday. He talked about everything from Russia invading Iran to securing the border against deadly vaccines. Boy, it was a hoot!

For those of you that didn’t have the pleasure of bearing witness to our benevolent leader stringing some words together, here are ten key moments from the speech:

1) When Biden told businesses to cut costs: Genius.

2) When Biden promised to triple inflation: Such ambition!

3) When security deftly switched out Nancy Pelosi for a Pelosi body double without the cameras seeing: Always so sad when MK Ultra wears off.

4) When Clarence Thomas lit up a joint about halfway through: For the nausea.

5) When MTG shotgunned three beers in less than a minute: A new State of the Union record! 

6) Chuck Schumer finally became a gif: Another one checked off the ole bucket list.

7) Biden made some little boy feel uncomfortable from 50 yards away: He’s been honing his skill.

8) When security dragged out Ron Paul for shouting “WROOONG!” every time Biden explained inflation: He did have a point, though.

9) When Pelosi ripped up pictures of ultrasounds in support of abortion: The only part of her audience participation that came naturally to her.

10) When the hand of God wrote ‘REPENT’ on the wall: An important moment but probably not Biden’s favorite.


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Knocked on 3,135,105 doors.

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