KYIV—Legends tell of a heroic fighter ace patrolling the skies above Ukraine, single-handedly beating back Russian air power. Latest reports indicate he has shot down between 13 and 793 enemy aircraft since the Russian army invaded over a week ago. 

Now, The Babylon Bee has obtained an exclusive, never-before-seen photo of the famous Ukrainian war hero known as the Ghost of Kyiv: 

WOW! What a handsome fellow! 

Eyewitnesses say they saw a “yuge” streak of orange light flashing across the night sky as Russian aircraft plummeted to the earth. The F-35 Lightning fighter jet— which was painted with the Chinese flag for some strange reason—buzzed over the crowd as the pilot waved to the photographer, who took this epic photograph. Amazing! 

We think we speak for everyone in saying we can all sleep a little more soundly at night knowing this brave protector is looking down from above. What a brave hero!

UPDATE: Sadly, The Ghost of Kiev is also shooting down Ukrainian pilots after hearing they said bad things about him on Twitter. 

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