Dr. Mehmet Oz is hoping to walk away from the Pennsylvania Senate primary with the GOP nomination all locked up.

But over here, we’re actually wondering if it’s Dr. Oz who should be locked up.

Seriously, this is creepy as hell:

Allllllrighty then.

Aside from the fact that he’s only been a Republican for like two minutes and holds views that could not even charitably be described as “kinda-sorta-conservative-ish,” he’s now determined to haunt our dreams or something.

It’s weird that he’s referring to himself in the third person. Maybe he got that from Donald Trump, who endorsed him and frequently refers to himself in the third person.

But we can’t recall Donald Trump ever talking to us about what he’d do to us in bed.

Does anyone want to think about that? And don’t say his wife, because if we were his wife and we’d heard him say that on national television, we’d be thinking twice about putting our head on that soft pillow and thinking about what he’d do.

That’s not the next Republican U.S. Senator from Pennsylvania, either. Blech.

If Dr. Oz is next to us in bed, the only thing we’d want him to do is to get the hell outta there.

Come to think of it, that’s what he should do in his Senate race, too.

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