U.S.—As Planned Parenthood locations shut down across America in the wake of Roe being overturned, “I Did That!” stickers featuring President Trump have appeared on each shuttered clinic.
Witnesses across the country in red states where abortion has already been banned or is about to be banned reported seeing the stickers appear on abortion clinics that have had to shut down.
“Those darn Republicans and their stickers,” said former Planned Parenthood accountant Cali Parker as she worked to scrape one off. “I just can’t believe it’s over. We survived one Republican president after the other until Trump came along.”
Despite abortion being only three percent of what Planned Parenthood does, somehow the loss of abortion revenue has caused several clinics to instantly close. “It’s a mystery is what it is,” said Ms. Parker as she shredded the clinic’s financial records. “Our business model definitely did not depend on pushing women towards letting us kill their babies and then selling the body parts for cash!”
At publishing time, sources had revealed that Planned Parenthood began selling their abandoned locations to new Calvary Chapel church plants.